First, we acknowledge each other as we walk by. Then, we smile and wish each other a good day. Next, we share a few comments about the weather, finally introduce ourselves, and begin to make small talk. This is how my relationships began with my walking friends; strangers that I’ve met while walking the same route each day to work, back when I lived in Chicago.
It was the colorful set of keys hanging from her belt that sparked our initial conversation. The young woman had decided to leave the corporate world to become a dog walker. Her mother, who initially left the room crying when she announced her career change, now introduces her as her successful entrepreneur daughter. Because she was out in all kinds of weather, she was tuned in to the National Weather Advisory 24/7 and became my personal weather forecaster.
Then, there was the striking, older couple who would take their morning constitutional; she, always wearing a stylish hat, and he, looking like Santa Claus and sporting a carved cane, but only for effect, his wife would say.
After running into them at a couple of charity events throughout the city, I would instinctively look for a lovely hat whenever I’d enter a venue. I never knew when they would pop into my life next, surprised to see him on a local TV station interview. It turns out he was a famous Chicago-area writer.
The neighbor who would be up so early walking his dog was always so cheery that I’d find myself smiling and continuing my route with a newfound spring in my step. After a chat one day, we were surprised to find out that his daughter and my son were the same age. This led to us comparing notes and swapping Millennial one-liners. A chance meeting in our neighborhood with our spouses led to a wonderful friendship.
A stranger is just a person that you haven’t gotten to know yet; take Miss Rye Bread. Once, when my son was a little boy, we were walking back from the grocery store and decided to stop at Woolworth’s. One of the cashiers, a young Filipino woman who seemed a bit stern at first, noticed our loaded cart and cheerfully said, “Why don’t you leave your cart here? Don’t worry, I’ll watch your rye bread,” noticing the loaf balanced at the top.
For years, we would say hello to “Miss Rye Bread” on the street, visit her in whatever area store she was working in, and never failed to surprise her with our rendition of ‘Happy Birthday” on her special day.
Nowadays, it’s not that strange to interact with strangers. Thanks to the internet, we date them, room with them, vacation in their homes, stay in their spare bedrooms, sleep on their sofas, rent their cars, and pay them to host us for dinner, along with other guests, who are also strangers.
As a child, I remember being told never to get into a car with a stranger. Then, Uber and Lyft came along, and I became totally confused. Now, companies have developed new technology whereby cars drive themselves. That means that when you’re picked up, there won’t even be a stranger in the car with you. Now, that’s strange!
As a self-taught expert in “strangerology,” I have found that it’s the age of the passerby and not the size of the city that dictates the level of eye contact. The younger the passerby, the more likely they are to be tuning out the world, either by wearing earphones or by walking, head down, transfixed by some form of social media. Please note: the latter technique should not be attempted by amateurs.
Next time you’re walking down the street, try smiling at a stranger as you pass them by and see their countenance change, as if by magic. That little flash of a human connection will change their day and will make yours!
Author’s Note:
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A Moxie Girl 