Are You at Your Tipping Point?

The barista smiled as she took my order. Adding an English Breakfast tea bag to each cup, she then filled them with boiling water. When I handed her my credit card for the $10.83 bill, she turned her digital tablet around and waited until I decided what tip to give her: 18%, 20%, 22% or 25%. Of course, I could have tapped on the choice that said “No tip” in tiny little letters.

Research has shown that the social pressure from the hovering of the employee awaiting your decision usually relates to the customer choosing the middle tip amount, thereby increasing the amounts now shown.

I’m all for restaurant industry employees making a reasonable living, but I was confused. Wasn’t that the barista’s job? Just as tip amounts have crept up from 10%, they’ve also wormed their way into non-gratuity industries such as food delivery workers, Uber drivers, Chipotle employees, mechanics, bakeries, delis and ice cream shops. Customers say they have even been asked for a tip when they use self-checkout machines at supermarkets, cafés, sports stadiums and airports!

After a recent New York Times article about freelance workers and independent contractors now seeking tips, almost 4000 comments were received, with the majority wondering how we got to the point where customers have to step up their tipping in order to supplement workers’ salaries.

The practice of tipping began back in medieval times when a master would reward his servant for a job well done. Historians agree tipping was almost nonexistent until 1840 in the U.S. Before the Civil War, many wealthy Americans adopted this custom from their European travels, as a way to show their elite status back at home. At the same time, Europeans immigrating to the U.S. brought their tipping practice with them.

Once the Civil War ended, a flood of freed slaves joined the workforce as servants, waiters, porters and barbers. Employers found tipping to be a way to pay a meager salary, with the expectation that their new staff would earn the rest of their income from tips.

In 1904, 100,000 members of the Anti-Tipping Society of America pledged not to tip for one year. By 1909, seven states passed anti-tipping legislation, citing giving or receiving tips was a misdemeanor. In Iowa, it led to 30 days of imprisonment. By 1919, the Iowa Supreme Court ruled the anti-tipping law unconstitutional. Soon, other states followed suit and tipping became engrained in our culture.

Restauranteurs realized quickly they could benefit greatly by subsidizing their staff’s pay with guests’ money. In 1938, the first federal minimum wage law was established, but restaurant workers were excluded. This paved the way for them to be paid entirely from tips. Today, it is still legal to pay a tipped worker as little as $2.13 in the U.S.

In 2015, acclaimed restauranteur Danny Meyer, who banned smoking a decade ahead of its enforcement in restaurants and bars, was at the forefront once again. The owner of 13 restaurants, including New York’s Union Square Café and Gramercy Tavern, he announced he would eliminate tipping at his restaurants. He felt this bold move was necessary in order to narrow the disparity between servers and cooks, who receive no tips. Though not every menu item was affected, many did increase by 30% to 35%. Devil’s Chicken, a famous dish at his restaurant Maialino, went from $29 to $39.

Unfortunately, COVID ended this policy for the many restaurants that joined Meyer’s band wagon and for Meyers as well. In a recent bon Appétit article, Meyers was quoted as saying

 “You shouldn’t feel obligated to tip on quick food transactions, like picking up takeout or ordering a cup of coffee.” Yet, Meyer’s casual chain restaurants, Shake Shack and Daily Provisions, use digital tablets at their ordering counters that prompt customers to tip.

Though many are not fans of tipping, it is unlikely to be banned any time soon. Instead, an organization called Restaurants Advancing Industry Standards in Employment or RAISE, is working to enact state and federal legislation to eliminate sub-minimum wage payments for tipped workers.

Ironically, our early 1900s anti-tipping movement was embraced by Europe, creating their current non-tipping culture.

I close with a poem written in the 1940’s by a disgruntled customer, left for his unsuspecting waiter:

Your attitude spurious
Has made me quite furious
And so, I retaliate
With no tip on the plate
But, lest it construes a non-pleasurable time
At the lady’s request, I leave you a dime

Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

Author’s Note:
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Doing the Big D with Big A  

Photo Big D

Happy Birthday, Big A*!

One month after his 28th birthday, our Bon Vivant was finally going to be at home for a weekend, so we (Mr. Wiz*, JC* and I) head to Dallas to celebrate. We take our festivities seriously; after much research and many emails and texts, we come up with our food-centric itinerary. Here are some of the weekend’s highlights:

Friday

The driving rain on our arrival did not deter us and we opt for a visit to the Dallas Museum of Art. We’re already impressed that the general admission is free, but then Jack, the elderly greeter at the entrance, quickly sizes us up, suggests we go see the Coco Chanel exhibit and we are transfixed. Five rooms from Coco Chanel’s Monaco home, Villa Pausa, have been painstakingly recreated in the museum. Once she married the Duke of Westminster, this was to be their home. When plans changed, she kept the house, but always felt a twinge of sadness for what might have been. The home was reborn when Dallas art collectors, Emery and Wendy Reves renovated it and hosted their most famous guest, Winston Churchill, who adopted it as his second home. Investigating all the nooks and crannies and reading all the personal letters and detailed descriptions of their lives there made for a lovely afternoon.

Big A’s furniture looks great in his new apartment. I particularly like his bedroom barn door. He surprises us with hors d’ oeuvres and serves us our favorite wine. A few toasts later, we’re off to Stampede 66 for dinner. We enjoy the braised beef short ribs and honey fried chicken as we peruse the décor, a mix of Texas whimsy and sophistication. Metal horse sculptures surround the TV monitors that feature a rodeo. I’m fascinated by a wall of wooden plaques with the names of Texas towns such as Looneyville and Dicey.

Saturday

It takes a lot to get Big A up and out early on a Saturday, so we are all in when he suggests we meet at 10:15 a.m. to stand in line for lunch at the Pecan Lodge. When lines started to form at their farmers market stall, the young business couple turned caterers knew they had an award-winning barbecue recipe and opened a restaurant. We eat a little of almost everything on the menu and agree the collard greens are the best we’ve ever had. Fortified, we walk around Deep Ellum, the revitalized warehouse district now full of shops, bars, restaurants and music venues.

With Big A as our guide, we get a tour of Dallas. Most people still remember where they were when President Kennedy was shot and the big X on the street marking the spot brings back a flood of memories. We play classical music on the radio as we drive through the Turtle Creek and Highland Park neighborhoods to view the mansions.

Leave it to JC to be the life of the party when she announces that in honor of Big A’s birthday, we will be having cocktails at the Petroleum Club, a private club on the 39th floor of Chase Tower. How did she make this happen? It all started the month prior, when she danced with a spry, 90 year-old retired doctor who mentioned the Austin Club, a private social club housed in a historic building in downtown Austin. Before you could say “sign-me-up,” JC had researched the club, texted me to see if Mr. Wiz and I were available for a complimentary lunch and a tour of the facility (we were!) and then proceeded to join. Now, as a member, she receives reciprocal privileges at dozens of clubs across the country.

The evening continued with dinner at St. Martin Wine Bistro, named one of the top 10 most romantic restaurants by Trip Advisor. We dined on grilled rack of lamb under a twinkling chandelier as we listened to the live piano music and toasted to a great day.

Sunday

According to D Magazine, we are brunching at one of the best spots in Dallas. Boulevardier is a French bistro, simple in décor but complex in flavors. I still dream about the 2 dishes that JC and I shared: the Prospector’s Breakfast (crispy oysters and arugula atop an open face omelette made with housemade bacon) and the Legs and Eggs (a crispy duck leg with sunny-side-up eggs served on stone ground grit cakes with huckleberry preserves). Not wanting to miss anything in this eclectic neighborhood, we head out for a walk-in the historic Bishop Arts District. The store displays are so incredible, we’re not surprised when signs ask that no photos be taken.

There is work to be done, so we head back to Big A’s. Mr. Wiz helps Big A hang some pictures, while JC and I head to the pool to relax. The boys find us one hour later, sound asleep in the shade. It’s Big A’s first time at the pool and I sense a look of panic on his face when I tell him that I’d be happy to introduce him to all of his neighbors that I’ve met (Millennials, no sense of humor!).

We head out on foot to explore Big A’s neighborhood, Knox-Henderson. The area is bustling; every restaurant, bar and shop is busy! Not sure if JC will want to climb all the stairs to a rooftop bar, I discreetly ask the waiter is there is an elevator (there isn’t). It’s then that I notice JC, who has already sprinted up the staircase, yelling down to ask me if I am all right. Big A is determined to have me taste a drink he thinks that I will love and by the end of the day, Deep Eddy Red Grapefruit Vodka, club soda and lime is my new fav.

Our dinner reservation is at a neighborhood restaurant, right down the block. Gemma has received rave reviews for the husband and wife team’s concept of sophisticated dining in a relaxed atmosphere. The blue and white décor combined with the professional wait staff’s control over the dining room create a tranquil setting. We liked the braised rabbit pappardelle and the chicken porchetta the best and were glad we shared 3 entrees (our secret for not overeating).

We say goodbye to Big A and head out of Dallas the next morning, determined to eat only lettuce leaves and ramp up our workouts for the next couple of days. We know we’ll be hungry for another visit soon. There are still lots of restaurants and sights we missed this time around and we want to check them off our list before Big A moves again.

*Who’s who? See “Cast of Characters” on the “About” page.